Exclusion
Maturity. Sophistication. Noguchi tables and a 'strong finish on the palate.' Miles Davis, simple salad dressing recipes, shopping at Tiffany’s and Ivy League colleges. In truth, they've always been there, but you haven't truly seen them until now and suddenly, they matter. Your parents just might have known a little something. These items, they're a part of your very being...a distinction that differentiates you from a lower grade. Your family has been there and while you're not unusual, you're certainly not typical.
You have what it takes to get there; it's just inherent. You speak the same language and understand value when you see it, so if you don't make it, it's a shame. This knowledge, this gift of simple awareness has been bestowed upon you without consciousness of any giving or receiving.
What you know is relevant. Your knowledge is referenced in conversation. It's used in business, and drives decisions. Stores are built around what you know and in fact, it's part of an elite popular culture. It's an undercurrent, yet ever-present in awareness amongst peers of all kinds...hippies, baristas, bakers and music aficionados...everyone, you might think.
But, not me. I'm not everyone. Until a handful of years ago, I wouldn't have known a Noguchi table if I banged my shin on it. My family didn't drink wine and in fact, cooking wasn't even something that was done...in ANY of my family's homes. For my family, cooking was a chore...understanding a Bechamel sauce and knowing how to cook fresh yams was never even a consideration.
I was raised without awareness and understanding. While this has left me with countless opportunities to spend my adult years learning fabulous things, I wonder if it rendered me too naive and uneducated in my 20s...when this level of knowledge paired with youth could have actually worked to my benefit.
Shit, I was trash! This girl could shout expletives with the rest of 'em and I took pride in being able to be 'one of the guys.' Holy shit. I just now remembered that...'one of the guys.' Anyway, I find myself questioning this lack of awareness and my comparison to you, the person who while you may not have had an ideal upbringing, you at least received the gift of knowledge and cultural awareness.
